Engrave "Stealing from Death..." CD/LP
DEFIANCE RECORDS L (50)
12.) everything pictures black.
an extra piece of human horse power meant to be structured into an assembly line tranquilizing routine stealing time dying on cue for the higher price exploring my frame code number 6079 the next drone in line number 6079 hollow backs and swollen fingertips my coughing fit has a sputum that`s bloodred simple process regurgitation plain function remains humankapital bestimmt die selbstverwirklichung wind up with a fuck up without get up without let up without hold up and coming off quite short the time clock never stops watch the second hand passing around picture the moment of death.
...our destination is the workforce. we all are destined to mold into the workforce at one point in our lives, some earlier than others, some later. if we strip our lives down to the basics of survival it comes down to eating and sleeping. to provide those two basics we have to engage in some sort of work ( that is unless you`re willing and strong enough to live on the streets ). we`re mostly selling our labour or the products of our labour to another person, the bossman or whatever, and we`re doing this for most of our lives, most of the day and most of us are doing it for low wages. we are basically spending the best years of our lives in slavery. i already made my experiences with the `real life´ of working and it sure was hell, working your ass off in a factory for half of the day, getting screamed at by some asshole with an inferiority complex and being tired for the remains of the day. right now i am still studying, getting prepared for a future joblife. i have been fortunate enough to do this, just pushing back the unavoidable decision to sell my life away a little bit further, because i am really afraid to make it. i really can`t imagine my life ten years from now on and i don`t want the clockface to dictate my life.
2.) optimum head movement none.
potential ambiguous self lulled to sleep breathing just a stale flickering haze of white washed terms simple black and white thoughts conveyed goddamn your black and white thoughts euer schwarz weiss system so tired of swallowing this shit any deviance is pictured black optimum head movement none pinned down handed down ideal images prescribing a linear process play pretty play living dead insecure shoulder tension painting this optical illusion this liberalism is spilling just rhetoric device contest its totality ventilate the rotting stench to insist on self constitution perspektivwechsel ausgeschlossen insist on self constitution.
gender, race and social status are just abstractions that divide our lives into certain categories. we are raised in a society that teaches us to behave according to these abstractions and we`re supposed to fulfil our role expectations. however life isn`t some one dimensional, rigid process, life is fluent and can`t be confined into some mold. however society does its best to do so. throughout our socialization ideals and aspirations are conveyed to us on how to live our lives, molding our characters for all time. we are taught these things until we believe them to be true, or at least those ideas are implanted within our minds so far as to where we don`t question or confront them. why are we starving ourselves and sweating in some gymn, the modern experimental lab, for the perfect body when we know it`s stupid, why do so many girls ( and boys ) have anorexia, why are we constantly trying to fulfil expectations others than ourselves? because we have been raised in a climate of consens and fear and it makes different desires and ideas that much harder to obtain, espescially when they`re socially sanctioned. for example i believe all humans to be bisexual, but with the ideal of heterosexuality and with this homophobia being taught to us from day one few will even consider it.... i don`t know...i`m just scared that my thoughts and feelings aren`t mine after all...
7.) houston syndrome.
auf der rückseite des mondes kein kontakt zur außenwelt and it`s going to take more than a rocket scientist for us to reach the surface again hurts when knowing these syndroms wie fremd steht man sich gegenüber man verhärtet zusehends rashly uttered words are eating at me inside me always beating the fuck out of a herd of dead horses lack of words bitten my tongue because this is a fight no one can win maybe we are both hurt scared maybe it`s just me failure to cover the distance right now a way back seems longer than towards the final destination den umkehrgrenzpunkt bereits überschritten i hear someone say the trick is to keep breathing glassy eyes just stand there awaiting the punchline you know you have to stop when i start to scream.
conversations among friends sometimes tend to get out of hand, joking around one word leads to another and the tone can easily get rash and harsh. pun or joke intended or intentional mean, we have to realize that our words can hurt each other, i have found this to be even moreso among those you trust and love. insults from those supposed to know and respect your feelings hurt more than anything else. how can that person you trust and like so much treat your feelings like shit, have you been taken in that much by that person? what makes things even worse is when the other one doesn`t realize the situation and just keeps beating the shit out of a dead horse, continuously treating your feelings like shit. but maybe it`s just me, maybe i just can`t take a fucking joke, or maybe it`s our insecurities that we`re too afraid to let others get close that we have to push them away by being cruel to each other. whenever something like this happens it just makes me feel sad. it keeps tearing at friendships slowly hollowing them out until the point when all contact is lost.
3.) the new realism is a texas product replacement.
this is destruction on purpose to erect and praise modern empty space aufbau durch zerstörung another ploy of concrete such pliable reserve lines this blatant display of priorities politics that benefit the industry those are politics of the industry it`s became predictable just a matter of securing subsidies and scraping up pennies for what it`s worth political rationalism along the lines of technological advance practicality only to a degree with the frame of optimum gain placed on everything within these structures nothing means nothing at all plain concessions evade any substance lies feed themselves on concrete walls remember please lost intentions.
lowering the standards to cover increasing demands thriving on this contradiction it`s the bribery of total productivity perpetuating this exploiting structure there is a fine line between previous intentions and material convenience possibly non-existent proklamiert aufbau durch zerstörung um alles leben auszurotten für eine welt aus beton decisions aren`t based on considering long term effects pulling the strings behind the scenes the tyranny of corporate policy revolving around momentary profit intentions exist just as mute conventions easily written off piles of concrete just one more time just one more grave biting the hand that feeds you.
politics are subject to economics and the imperativ of economics is a continuous development of its productive powers. in this way the capitalist society is one of irrationality and contradiction. it is deeply opportunistic, setting priorities according to the maxime of maximum profit, focusing on momentary profit rather than long term effects of decisions. already marx pointed out the exploiting and destructive tendencies of the capitalist society chasing down new possibilities of profit all over the world until there`s nothing left. the destruction of our earth is already at hand: everyday another species of animals vanishes from the planet, are the rainforests cut down and the ozone layer is fading away and then again governments are debating about and quitting something like the kyoto treaty, which is basically just a small step. we are shooting ourselves in the foot if we prioritize economic profit over everything else. the convenience that rules our lives is an obstacle towards urgent measures being taken. it`s saddening that anything that`s valuable but doesn`t throw of profit is left behind in the wake of economic interests, like reservations about human rights abuses from the chinese government being silenced for the sake of german economic relationships.
1.) cowboy mentality.
preliminary thought übersteigt den verstand wissentlich oder auch nicht ganz egal welches leben an eurem zerbricht all this waving of indignation welcomes simple answers to this complexity reason whispers in economics when disparity demands escapes polished propaganda for approval there`s a hidden plot to everything you`re bringing out the dead again and again yesterdays shadows and all their guilt all your footprints lead to ruins it`s all you have ever known and everything will stay the same allowing nothing to change and it`s so sad the price of oil dictating the value of life watching from the sidelines we all end up in the swing of things same ploy as before completely utterly fucked.
the date is march 20th 2003. tonight bombs and missiles started to rain down on Iraq again. In an deliberate event to overthrow its dictator and democratize it the US waged war against the middle eastern country it had first helped to bring up, support its war against Iran and tolerate the massmurder of the curdish minority and then bring it down in the first gulf war... and now again. all this happens in the name of freedom and democracy. however history teaches us that most wars aren`t fought for these noble goals. quite contrary wars are almost solely fought on economic purposes, whereas humanitarian causes are expendable: in response to the september 11th terrorist attacks on New York and Washington the US enrolled in military action against Afghanistan one of the poorest countries in the world. the war of the US and its allies not only devastated the country further it also put the lives of hundred of thousands of afghan civilians at risk. more than five million people were already totally dependent on international aid before september 11th. after the terrorist attacks in America Washington demanded that Pakistan should close its borders to Afghanistan, trapping hundreds of thousands afghan refugees in the war stricken country and cutting off food supplies. lots of international aid organizations were warning of an impending humanitarian catastrophe and no one really knows how many died during the cold winter months. what`s really saddening and frightening about these incidents is that those are just recent examples of a nation`s interests dictating the value of human life and whereas it can be argued that wars might not be fought solely on economic purposes it sure makes the decision to rush to war that much easier, as seems to be the case now again. there really is no such thing as a just war.
5.) ...and what hurts the most is that i can`t do or say a damn thing about it.
it`s repetitious it`s repetitious it`s cyclic maddening these silent conventions paint distorted smiles with just one arm left i`ll defend your recovery i`m in denial of this eventually everything dies falling to uncharted graves easily forgotten momentary motion simply ceases to exist someday we`ll say goodbye so dance while you still can there`s not a single thing to say or do carrying the weight of broken wings but press those eyes lidless anyway to pretend is to know means a kiss on the face of her pretense forever lasts a moment the past is always buried within cardbox memories i don`t want this memory i don`t need this memory i always thought this was meant forever.
some years ago my grandmother suffered a severe stroke. ever since then she wasn`t the person i used to know. stroke followed after stroke and her health and psyche got progressively worse up to the point where she had to be sent to a mental home as she wasn`t sane anymore and her brain was constantly out of focus. after some time in the institution and on medication her health got better so she could be moved to a retirement home. although she wasn`t as confused as before and things were getting better period, it was all downhill from there on, with alzheimer`s disease and parkinson being the symptoms of slow decay. i used to know my grandmother as always being acitve, planting crops in her garden and taking care of everything herself. seeing her now only a shadow of the woman she once was and seeing her slowly dying is breaking my heart. i don`t want my grandmother to die, i don`t want anyone i love to die. ever since i was a small kid i was fucking afraid of death, of the end to all ends. i would love to believe that there`s some sort of life after death, heaven or hell, that your soul lives on, but i can`t. in my mind everything you once were, your body, your soul, just ceases to exist, you are simply erased from all existence. our lives are short and they end one minute at a time, let`s not waste a single breath.
11.) oh come on dude, outgrow your post-whatever phase
black hair dye pretentiousness and tye tainted sassyness congratulations for rehashing a carbon copy from a copy from a copy putting old friends to death is probably a good way of burning bridges you have come a long way baby but all our photographs are yellowed and cracked polished boredom turns into a market scheme you are assimilation our simplicity sways with everthing we have to it smiling swaying sweating screaming with heart with mind with fire and what have you gained from this where have you been where are you going once you are gone you will leave no trace goodbye.
so this is what`s become of you: another indie carbon copy poser singing all the same lame songs about how your girlfriend dumped you. and i could really care less about you, after all people change and i have to respect that. but what really bothers me is when people like you are mocking me or hardcore/punk in general with your stupid grins of belittlement saying you`ve been into that some ago. true there is a lot of shit within the `scene´, an elitist microcosm within society that pretends to be revolutionary and falls really short of it but there is potential in it and i have learned a lot from this. but apart from all your past fingerpointing, moshing or whatever you seem to have gained nothing from this. you can call this just a phase of puberty and never understand what it means to me. this is fire and fuel to me, there are bands that maybe aren`t that good musicians, but they`re putting everything into what they`re doing and being totally sincere in this. and granted we might not be doing the most innovative music but i claim that we are doing it with all of our hearts and sincerity in the feelings conveyed. maybe one day i will change and stop being involved in this, but all the noise, all the words we listened to, all the shows in some basement, all the late night drives, this will always have a safe place in my heart. to you i say good luck, maybe you`ll find some depth and warmth on greener pastures.
8.) touch up asthetic.
the constant humming of the electric`s static a strung out regurgitation of blurred images of synthetically engineered celebrities black and white bullshit in colour on screen the light hits just perfectly stuck in this infinite loophole angles determine perception and my thought process is numbed if we could only fathom the extent of images projected upon desires contrived and cultivated in decades of white noise and glossy facades it`s perfect it`s sterile it`s artificial death relive my role expectations on and on so commonly hours for so many others.
everytime i turn on my tv i get bombarded with images that tell me what i need to look like, what i need to buy and how i need to behave to lead the perfect life. it`s building this kind of body/ possession/ attitude/ behaviour cult and we`re all hooked on their candy coated images. day in day out we`re wasting our time in front of the elctric screen and while we maybe realize that a lot of what we`re seeing is glorified, artificial bullshit a lot of it may pass without notice, but leaving behind a subtle imprint on our minds. most of what is shown on tv is simply regurgitating societies standards. whereas the media definitely has a big influence as a socialization institution, even moreso nowadays than it did in the past, and could offer alternative norms or lifestyles we`re just shown the usual stuff. it`s trivial but think about how many movies have a guy in it playing the main character and how many movies have a woman as main character that isn`t portrayed in traditional women role expectations... we`re force fed their black and white stereotypes and it`s scaring to think about what all may have passed unnoticed and what might have sunken into our minds, molding our characters and norms. just turn it off.
4.) night sky repercussions.
come along red dawn radiate through blood and heart in and out of cellular structures moving out of focus to be moving all the time in every direction at once every second of every hour there`s a desire to run across the orange wet of streets under night skies to be standing at the shore of something really vast to recompense past stagnant days transparency just like the way birds are weighted down by grey thoughts of dusky skies our hearts are heavy with the dance of days forgotten und das sind wünsche leise dialoge old trees whistling forever petaled secrets you have never known breathe in breathe out wishing for every imperfection savour all these moments oh let it rain it clears the streets of the silent armies so we can dance again.
somtimes i just feel so damn confined within my surroundings that i just get the feeling to start running, to hop on my bike, get in my car and just go.... there`s something comforting and liberating in the way the scenery passes you by or the wind blowing in your face. there is pure beauty out there in nature`s simplicity, in trees swaying in the wind, or birds dancing on the horizon. all this seems so much more real then our neon cities. and it`s the sight of green woods, blue skies, of waves caressing the shore of an ocean that put a lump in my throat and butterflies in my stomach. it makes everything else appear so small and irrelevant and shows that there is something more to life than our pathetic little hearts can grasp.
10.) seized and redeployed.
take what you need from whereever you please recontextualization entirely words are only collections of symbols put in some preordained form and it`s already been said before everything is meaningless unless we choose to give it meaning.
self-expression must not know intellectual property. we learn from the theories and philosophies of great thinkers. if self-expression is confined to your own ideas, it is truly confined and how can anyone expect to express something complex as thoughts or feelings in words if we´re bound to the confines of our own imagination. after all there might be few things that are truly new under the sun and what sense does it make to respect a collection of symbols somebody else already put in some form before you. take what is relevant to you and your life from everything around you and adopt it to your own life, make it your own theory, philosophy, poem, song-lyric whatever...we can only gain from this.